Controlling Behavior: 9-1/2 Weeks

I’m watching “9-1/2 Weeks.” It was made back when Micky Rourke was sexy.

Essentially, Micky meets Kim and slowly takes over every aspect of her life. Sexually, he keeps pushing her boundaries, making her go farther and farther until, inevitably, she rebels and leaves him.

I understand sexual enthrallment. I’ve experienced it. Hell, AJ and I are in the middle of that now. Can’t get enough of each other, skin so sensitive that the brush of clothing when you dress almost makes you groan, and every love song you hear resonates in your soul.

There’s nothing else like it. 

But…and this is a big ‘but,’ would you let things get to the point where you’re allowing your lover to manipulate and control you?

For instance, there’s a scene in the film where Micky leaves Kim alone in his apartment on purpose, to see if, when she gets bored enough, she’ll start going through his closet and personal things. It’s a trap, and when he catches her at it, he says he knew she would. She gets pissed and smacks him, but not hard.

Kim, why were you snooping? He was an asshole for setting up that situation, but you played right into it instead of maintaining your dignity.

I’m sure there are men who couldn’t resist poking around, just as I’m sure there are men and women who would curl up in a chair with a book and never touch the closet door or open a dresser drawer.

Then there’s the shoplifting scene. She admires a necklace, he whispers that she should take it, and she does. I get that Micky is somehow giving her permission to act out all her fantasies, but is stealing one of them? I think it’s his fantasy that she does what she’s told, and when she does, his control of her tightens that much more.

How about the scene where he asks her to meet him at a hotel room, where’s he’s set up an unpleasant surprise in the shape of a female hooker. He wants Kim to fuck her while he watches. He didn’t ask her first, they never discussed it, he just did it. He wants to see how far he can push her, and finally, finally, Kim’s had enough, but still she doesn’t leave him.

This movie suggests if you are sexually aroused, put your brains under the bed until after you’ve had an orgasm or three. Don’t question, just go with the flow. He treats you like shit? What does that matter if the sex is the hottest you’ve ever had? Crawl across the floor for him on your hands and knees because he demands it. Dress up like a man and let him place you in dangerous situations. Steal a gold necklace just because he told you to. Cozy up to strangers and share your body with them because he asks you to, not because you want to. Lose yourself in him to the point where you cease to exist just to please him. Let him completely humiliate you before you realize at last what a jerk he is.

But it’s only a movie.

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About Fenraven

Fenraven happily lives in south Florida, where it is really hot most of the year. Find him on Twitter, Google +, and Facebook by searching on 'fenraven'.
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One Response to Controlling Behavior: 9-1/2 Weeks

  1. I think all depends on the talent your couple has to manipulate others and how vulnerable you are. Never say never. But I don’t think everyone is willing to be a puppet, no matter how good the sex is. It’s something more. It’s not just the sex, it’s something else that the person needs and they think the other is providing it.

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