Let Me Stay

Daylight savings time screws up my internal clock. The last two mornings, I’ve woken up far too early and can’t go back to sleep, so I lay there in the dark, listening to my mind run the hamster wheel.

I think about my mom and wonder how she’s doing. I think about the move and anxiety floods through me, almost making me gasp. I think about being alone in a city I don’t know and a black hole opens inside me. 

I think about being without JJ and almost cry.

I don’t want to do this. I don’t want my life to change. I like where I am, here with him and my friends and my favorite restaurants and bars. 

But I have to. I have to.

Thinking in the dark, in the small quiet hours of morning, is always a mistake. I know this, but the mind has a will of its own. 

I hate daylight savings.

About Fenraven

Fenraven happily lives in south Florida, where it is really hot most of the year. Find him on Twitter, Google +, and Facebook by searching on 'fenraven'.
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